THE TOILET

The toilet is possibly one of the worst inventions ever. It is as if the inventor of the toilet wanted to intentionally make it the most disgusting device ever created. The toilet is more disgusting than anything that goes into it.
Design-wise, the toilet is a real piece of work. There are dozens of nooks and crannies that filth can get into. It is nearly impossible to get it out without a toothpick and a cotton swab. Any moisture that gets on the seat drips down onto the rim and outside of the bowl. It takes over an hour to clean it enough to dirty it up again! Perhaps this was done intentionally years ago to waste a good portion of the average housewife's day.
Besides the many design flaws, flushing a toilet in America uses gallons of perfectly good drinking water and makes it undrinkable for millennia. One flush uses more water than the average person needs to drink each day to survive. Every time we flush a toilet in America, we may as well simultaneously flip off someone living in Sub-Saharan Africa.
What is the toilet doing INSIDE of our homes, anyway. Instead of pooping indoors, why didn't we just upgrade the outhouses a little? Why put the toilet right next to the place that we bathe or brush our teeth? Far better to poop as far away from where we do the rest of our other daily activities.
Public toilets are the worst(at least in the men's room). If you are lucky enough to be the first squatter that day in that restroom, you might not have a completely horrible experience. I say 'not completely horrible' because it is, after all, a public restroom and it is going to be a little horrible. Some guy always breaks off the coat hook on the stall door so you end up having to try to stuff your coat in the handicap rail by the toilet. There is plenty of graffiti to read, but most of it is unimaginative at best. Unless the restroom was power-washed or detailed by some janitorial ninja, there will most likely be evidence of past poopy smears below the paper dispenser which is always lovely.
It's the 21rst century for Pete's sake. Shouldn't we have self-cleaning, composting toilets or cool 'Dune' suits that recycle our fecal matter and such. When is modern science going to deal with this crap?